My kids are going to need therapy…

My kids are going to need therapy no matter what. I'll either love them too much or not enough, but either way they're going to need therapy.

I can feel people cringing at this statement about therapy; like only the "screw ups" go to therapy. (I believe that therapy, especially talk therapy is vital for everyone. More on this another day.)

The reason I say this is because there is a lot of pressure that we put on ourselves as moms to "not screw up our kids". And if our own personal pressure isn't enough, we get bombarded from literally everyone else.

Are you limiting screen time?

Is the baby sleeping on his/her back?

Are you breast feeding?

Are you stimulating him/her enough? But not too much.

Are you helping him/her develop cognitively?

Are you feeding him/her healthy foods?

And on and on and on.

And it doesn't get easier as they get older. In fact, I feel it's getting a bit more complicated as I raise teenagers, because I feel they will remember more and my words and actions will have an even bigger impact (good or bad).

So how do I keep from paralyzing myself and "not screwing up" my kids?

I give myself a lot (and I mean a lot) of grace.

I've told my kids repeatedly, "This is my first time being your mom and it's your first time being my kids. We're going to get some stuff wrong, but we can always learn from our mistakes."

I've found it's a delicate harmony between wanting to curl up in the fetal position and feeling like I'm really nailing the whole mom thing. Furthermore, my kids are going to have their own lessons they need to learn and their own personal healing journey. I truly believe my kids choose me to be their mom for a reason and it will all work out perfectly in the end.

Motherhood is not easy, but fortunately, we don't have to get it perfect. We just have to love ourselves, because really when we love our full selves, we give our kids permission to love their full selves and there is nothing more important than that.

PS- If you're feeling the pressure of motherhood and need some support- reach out to me. I have a free support community, as well as my current program- Motherhood Manifesto: Finding peace in the chaos of motherhood. Join here- www.theopulentlife.com/motherhood-manifesto